”I think midlife is when the universe gently places her hands upon your shoulders, pulls you close, and whispers in your ear:
I’m not screwing around. It’s time. All of this pretending and performing – these coping mechanisms that you’ve developed to protect yourself from feeling inadequate and getting hurt – has to go.
Your armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts. I understand that you needed these protections when you were small. I understand that you believed your armor could help you secure all of the things you needed to feel worthy of love and belonging, but you’re still searching and you’re more lost than ever.
Time is growing short. There are unexplored adventures ahead of you. You can’t live the rest of your life worried about what other people think. You were born worthy of love and belonging. Courage and daring are coursing through you. You were made to live and love with your whole heart. It’s time to show up and be seen.”
~ Brené Brown
It has been my life for a while now, that I find myself sitting back and watching my life pass by. Not watching in a sense of ‘taking it all in’, but more in an ‘I’ll get to it later’ or ‘I can’t wait until…’ sort of way.
For the majority of my adult life I have found it a difficult thing to commit myself to staying in one place and somehow managed to not accomplish a whole lot in the process; and as such, I have been living the life of somewhat of a vagabond (despite having hitched myself to the wagon of another and having brought into this world three beautiful children).
But now I find myself in a new realm of desire. One where what things look like are far less important than what they actually are and there is a longing in me to find my way to a place where I can put roots in the ground (both figuratively and literally) and perhaps in the process even leave a piece of this world a little better than it was before.
My purpose in this new and evolving life (and within these words and those yet to come) is to create a space that is open and honest and helps brings me to a place of simplicity and peace. It is a space for me to hold myself accountable for feeling gratitude for what is right in front of me and appreciating the amazing surroundings amongst me in this world.
This space is a channel for me to chronicle my journey to this place of solitude, sustainability and serenity and share it with whomever is willing to listen.